those that do and those that dont

there always seems to be two choices.
-one that doesn't make you feel goo
-and one that does
but truthfully.. it isn't as simple as choosing the latter. i can't seem to put the feeling into words, but somehow even if the experience doesn't leave you with that lovely feeling, if given the chance.. you would do it again. how does that work? how can it not just be as simple as loving those that love you back? because now the feeling of wanting always seems to be there.. through the mistreating, and the bad words and the why-am-i-here experiences
you just want it.